


A M i s t a k e

by Snicker_dood



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gender Dysphoria, Genderfluid Character, Genderfluid Kageyama Tobio, Group chat, M/M, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Texting, chat fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2019-11-21 20:55:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 8,347
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18147305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snicker_dood/pseuds/Snicker_dood
Summary: Hinata Shouyou: Group chat!!Kageyama Tobio: This is a mistake I hope you know.Yachi Hitoka: I’m sure it’ll be fine!!!（*´▽`*)Hinata Shouyou changed Kageyama Tobio’s name to “Milk Man”.Milk Man: A  M I S T A K EHinata makes a group chat and no one likes it.Updates twice a month, three times if I'm not dead





	1. the Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> first fic :-:

**Hinata** **shouyou added Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei, Yachi Hitoka, and Yamaguchi Tadashi**

 

 **Hinata Shouyou:** Group chat!!

 

 **Kageyama Tobio:** This is a mistake I hope you know.

 

 **Yachi Hitoka:** I’m sure it’ll be fine!!!（*´▽`*)

  


**Hinata Shouyou changed Kageyama Tobio’s name to “Milk Man”.**

  


**Milk Man:** A  M I S T A K E

 

 **Tsukishima Kei:** for once I agree with kageyama

  


**Hinata Shouyou changed Tsukishima Kei’s name to “Bitch™”.**

  


**Bitch™:** im telling mom.

 

 **Hinata Shouyou:** NO!!!!

 

 **Milk Man:** mom?

 

 **Yamaguchi Tadashi:** suga

 

 **Milk Man:** Christ

 

 **Yachi Hitoka:** God can’t save you now

 

 **Milk Man:** ~~~~Y a C h i ???

  


**Yachi Hitoka changed their name to “Your worst nightmare”.**

  


**Your worst nightmare:** due to personal reasons I’m evil now.

  


**Your worst nightmare changed Yamaguchi Tadashi’s name to “Star boy”.**

  


**Star boy:** (＊◕ᴗ◕＊)

 

 **Hinata Shouyou:** hey wait I don’t have a name yet!!

  


**Milk Man changed Hinata Shouyou’s name to ”Orange peel”**

  


**Orange peel:** ….

 

 **Orange peel:** I don’t like it.

 

 **Milk Man:** my name is literally milk man

  


**Orange peel changed Milk Mans name to Blueberry**

  


**Blueberry:** uncreative but better.

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** uncreative.

 

 **Blueberry:** SHUT

**——————-**

**Star boy:** did anyone else just hear hinata yell just now?

 

 **Orange peel:** I STUBBED MY TOE!!!!

 

 **Star boy:** are you ok?????

 

 **Orange peel:** yeah but it fucking hurt.

 

 **Blueberry:** WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT WORD?

 

 **Orange peel:** Fuck???

 

 **Bitch™:** He probably got it from me.

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I won’t hesitate bitch.

 

 **Orange peel:** how come you guys can curse but I can’t

 

 **Bitch™:** because you’re a child.

 

 **Orange peel:** I’m pretty sure I’m older than all of you??

 

 **Orange peel:** Kageyama is the child.

 

 **Blueberry:** u wanna die?

 

 **Bitch™:** I do

  


**Blueberry changed Bitch™’s name to “Depressed Bitch™”**

  


**Depressed Bitch™:** u rite

 

 **Blueberry:** oh no

 

 **Blueberry:** noya saw the chat, guys help.

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** suffer thot.

 

 **Orange peel:** Noya’s chasing him

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** H A

 

 **Blueberry:** Hdonowlpskenal

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** wow I can’t believe Kageyama's dead.

 

 **Blueberry:** Hhhhhiiiiyyyyaaa

 

 **Blueberry:** I’m adding myself and you can’t stop me!!

  


**Blueberry added Nishinoya Yu to the chat.**

  


**Blueberry changed Nishinoya Yu’s name to “Noya!!”**

  


**Depressed Bitch™:** kill m e

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** hi noya!!

 

 **Noya!!:** HI YACHI!!!!

 

 **Blueberry:** I’m telling mom

 

 **Noya!!:** IM SORRYYYY!!! (´Ａ｀。)

 

 **Noya!!:** I just wanted to know what you guys were doooiinnggg  ;-;

 

 **Orange peel:** shitposting

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** Hinata said fuck

 

 **Noya!!:** he W H A T.

 

 **Orange peel:** KAGEYAMA'S THE YOUNGEST WHY DOES HE GET TO SAY FUCK??!!

 

 **Noya!!:** h e  i s n ‘ t

 

 **Blueberry:** that was ominous..

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** kageyama said fuck

 

 **Noya!!:** im telling mom

 

 **Blueberry:** d o n t

 

 **Noya!!:** >:(

 

 **Blueberry:** ;-;

 

 **Star boy:** Truce???

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** always the pacifist

 

 **Star boy:** I know where you live

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** (ﾟдﾟ；)

 

 **Noya!!:** welp, if this is all you’re doing I’ll get out of your hair

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** leave

 

 **Noya!!:** wow rood

  


**Noya!! left the chat**

  
  


**Depressed Bitch™:** freedom

 

 **Star boy:** don’t be mean Tsukki

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** ur not my mom

 

 **Star boy:** I’ll tell mom

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** stop using suga as a threat

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** suga is a threat

**———————**

**Blueberry:** Hinata did you drink my milk.

 

 **Orange peel:** n o

 

 **Blueberry:** if you wanted one I would have bought you one

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** g a y

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** g a y

 

 **Star boy:** g a y

 

 **Blueberry:** l i s t e n   h e r e

 

 **Orange peel:** I have strawberry milk you can have

 

 **Blueberry:** YES

 

 **Star boy:** kageyama is a child we must protect

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** protec

 

 **Blueberry:** wait no

  
**Your worst nightmare:** Shush child, you’re safe now


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blueberry: ya know maybe throwing myself off a cliff isn’t the worst idea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm doing short chapters so I can update often. I might switch to longer updates soon but here's the new chapter!

**Blueberry:** ya know maybe throwing myself off a cliff isn’t the worst idea.

 

**Star boy:** are you ok??

 

**Blueberry:** NO 

 

**Blueberry:** I don’t know what to do?? I don’t want to tell anyone so like??

 

**Star boy:** if you don’t want to talk about it that’s fine.

 

**Star boy:** tsukki and I are getting ice cream after practice if you want to come with us though.

 

**Orange peel:** CAN I COME TOO??!!

 

**Star boy:** sure! 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** first years trip!

 

**Blueberry:** thanks guys :)

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Kageyama?? Showing emotions? I’m my group chat?? It’s more likely than you think.

 

**Blueberry:** S H U T

 

**————————**

 

**Orange peel:** uh. Help?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** hinata if you move one god damn inch I’ll kill you.

 

**Orange peel:** ok I w o n ' t ;-;

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I left for 2 seconds and y’all are already being gay.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** bold of you to assume we’re not always gay. 

 

**Star boy:** I think it’s cute.

**Orange peel:** kageyama feel asleep on my shoulder and I don’t know what to do.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** idk what happened earlier but he’s been worn out all day.

 

**Orange peel:** is that concern I hear??

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** n O

 

**Star boy:** tsukki can be sweet when he wants to!! ^_^

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** SHUT YOUR FUCK

 

**Orange peel:** ok but what do I do???

 

**Your worst nightmare:** night guys!

 

**Orange peel:** w a i t

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** night

 

**Star boy:** Good night!!

 

**Orange peel:** W A I T

 

**Orange peel:** GUYS 

 

**————————**

 

**Blueberry:** I’m feeling a lot better today, thanks guys. 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** good to hear!!

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** we’ve successfully protected the child. 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** the child is safe.

 

**Blueberry:** not again 

 

**Orange peel:** Can’t believe you guys left me ;-;

 

**Your worst nightmare:** we had to let the child sleep

 

**Orange peel:** YoU DIDNt haVe to leAve mE

 

**Star boy:** but it was cccuuuuutttteeee

 

**Orange peel:** >:O

 

**Your worst nightmare:** You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but what happened kageyama?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I am physically and mentally dying to know what happened.

 

**Blueberry:** ur gonna have to wait

 

**Blueberry:** have fun dying 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** oof, at least you’re doing ok

 

**Blueberry:** I’m still working things out rn but it’s been good

 

**Blueberry:** but in all seriousness I’ll tell you guys soon I just need some time to think n stuff.

 

**Star boy:** alrighty!!(｀▽´)

 

**Your worst nightmare:** y are you adorable?

 

**Star boy:** OwO

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I take it back

 

**Star boy:** wait no what did I do

 

**Star boy:** Yachi???!!

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like I'm moving a little fast-paced, so things will probably slow down a bit.
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated! :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Orange peel: he’s allergic to love
> 
> Your worst nightmare: well we better get an EpiPen cuz you’re about to be exposed to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update!
> 
> Also thanks for the kudos and comments. My heart swells every time someone says something supportive so thanks!!

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m so tired rn

 

**Star boy:** you can take a nap during lunch, I’ll wake you up.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** we all know I wouldn’t get up

 

**Your worst nightmare:** take care of yourself!!!! 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ur not my mom

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’ll kill you with affection 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** >:(

 

**Orange peel:** he’s allergic to love

 

**Your worst nightmare:** well we better get an EpiPen cuz you’re about to be exposed to it.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Jesus I’ll sleep more 

 

**Star boy:** g o o d :)

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** o_o

 

**Blueberry:** There’s no milk in the vending machine…

 

**Orange peel:** ruh roh raggy 

 

**Blueberry:** I’m SUING 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you can’t do that 

 

**Blueberry:** I'M LEAVING AN ANGRY NOTE.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** we can’t stop you but please don’t

 

**Blueberry:** ;-; all they have is orange juice 

 

**Orange peel:** ya got a problem with oranges??

 

**Blueberry:** I have a problem with you

 

**Orange peel:** U wanna fight?

 

**Blueberry:** U wanna die?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yams just snorted and got his phone taken away. 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** this is great 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ajhskadkkskak

 

**Orange peel:** gay keyboard smash

 

**Blueberry:** gay keyboard smash 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** gay keyboard smash 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** can you don't

 

____________

 

**Orange peel:** guys

 

**Orange peel:** guess who I caught making out in the storage closet 

 

**Star boy:** suga and Daichi??

 

**Orange peel:** no that happens too often for it to be surprising 

 

**Orange peel:** IT WAS TANKA AND HAVSJAHSKAHAKNAKA

 

**Blueberry:** he ded

 

**Blueberry:** I bet it was ennoshita tho they’ve been flirting all week I stg.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** r u n

 

**Blueberry:** wha 

 

**Blueberry:** OH SHIT BOIBSJDHAKJSKAB

 

**Star boy:** Thanos snapped 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** who taught you that?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ;;

 

**Your worst nightmare:** what did I say about teaching yams dead memes? 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** n o t  t o

 

**Your worst nightmare:** it’s ur turn to run 

 

**Star boy:** and then there was 1

 

_________

 

**Blueberry:** how the fuck do people walk in heels I almost twisted my ankle 

 

**Orange peel:** ur too tall anyway

 

**Blueberry:** you’re just scared of being even shorter than me

 

**Orange peel:** >:0

 

**Orange peel:** wait why were you wearing heels anyway 

 

**Blueberry:** I wanted to see how they felt I guess 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** knife shoes

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** one kick equals death 

 

**Star boy:** one swift kick to the stomach 

 

**Blueberry:** I’m putting that with the rest of my evidence that Yamaguchi killed someone.

 

**Star boy:** I wouldn’t hurt anyone!!! 

 

**Orange peel:** “one swift kick to the stomach.”

 

**Star boy:** l i s t e n 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you find typos tell me and I'll fix them!


	4. chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kageyama's crisis explained

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please point out any mistakes! :)

**Blueberry:** uh, remember the thing??

 

**Blueberry:** the thing that I was freaking out about a day or two ago.

 

**Orange peel:** you mean the day we got ice cream together 

 

**Blueberry:** yeah, I’ve been thinking about it so I’ll tell you, looking back it’s kinda funny.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’ve been summoned 

 

**Blueberry:** did you have fun dying?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** n o

 

**Blueberry:** so I’m genderfluid..

 

**Star boy:** WE LOVE AND SUPPORT YOU!!!

 

**Blueberry:** I freaked out for a second

 

**Your worst nightmare:** we’re all gay in this town. Of course, we support you!! (*'▽'*)

 

**Blueberry:** I know we’re having a moment but I read the first part of that in a country accent.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** afsjndksmslsl

 

**Blueberry:** ok but like, when my mom isn’t home I try on her dresses sometimes. That day I thought I was home alone so I was trying on clothes.

 

**Blueberry:** but she was home and caught me wearing one of her dresses. I didn’t talk to her that day because I was really scared of what she’d say. 

 

**Blueberry:** but the next morning she confronted me about it, so I came out to her. 

 

**Orange peel:** how’d that go?

 

**Blueberry:** she gave me a hug and let me keep the dress.

 

**Star boy** : AW

 

**Your worst nightmare:** WHOLESOME 

 

**Blueberry:** I cried a HECK ton 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** still can’t believe you have other emotions besides anger 

 

**Blueberry:**  >:0 when I find you it’s on SIGHT

 

**Star boy:** Plz don’t hurt tsukki 

 

**Orange peel:** awww

 

**Your worst nightmare:** he protec, he attac, but most importantly he fight bac

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yams punched a kid in elementary school 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** you’re LYING 

 

**Star boy:** YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP TSUKKI

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Yama said fuck :0

 

**Orange peel:** MOOOOMMMM

 

**Star boy:** I WAS SET UP ;-;

 

**Blueberry:** yamaguchi is the only first-year who can say fuck

 

**Star boy:** noooooooo

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** too late, your fate is sealed.

 

———————

 

**Orange peel:** ugghh…. people…. so… pretty….

 

**Blueberry:** are you having a stroke??

 

**Your worst nightmare:** Hinata, your pan is showing 

 

**Orange peel:** GJFJSJAKksnskdnalNhjsjJsb

 

**Blueberry:** hear me out,,,,, boooyyyssss

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** rt rt rt rt RT

 

**Star boy:** everyone’s pretty (*´꒳`*)

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ur missing something… GIRLS THO

 

**Orange peel:** AH

 

**Star boy:** AGH

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** speaking of girls

 

**Your worst nightmare:** if this is going where I think it’s going…

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Ki-

 

**Your worst nightmare:** SHUT

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yo

 

**Your worst nightmare:** STAHP

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ko 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** YOU BITCH

 

**Blueberry:** Kiyoko huh?? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Orange peel:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Star boy:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Your worst nightmare:** fuuuucccckkkkkk ooooffffff ;-;

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> no...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyo, thank you for the kudos and comments!  
> Sorry, I haven't answered any comments I might do that soon though.

**Depressed Bitch™:** my ears are bleeding from how loud my music is.

 

**Star boy:** why is it up so loud???

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** because Noya has been talking about Asahi for the past 40 minutes.

 

**Star boy:** when is he going to admit he has a crush on him

 

**Blueberry:** says you.

 

**Star boy:** AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN

 

**Blueberry:** :)

 

**Orange peel:** why is math so hard?

 

**Blueberry:** it’s not you’re just a dumbass 

 

**Orange peel:** YOUR GRADES AREN'T ANY BETTER THAN MINE 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I can help you study guys. 

 

**Orange peel:** a goddess.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ya know who yachi thinks is a goddess? 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I stg, I’ll say it 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** wait no

 

**Your worst nightmare:** u see my username don’t test me 

 

**Star boy:** secrets??? 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** damn it Yachi

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ÚwÙ 

 

**Blueberry:** I put too much sugar in my tea holy fuck

 

**Blueberry:** Is this what being high feels like 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you ruined the tea you monster 

 

**Star boy:** this is why I use honey 

 

**Star boy:** do you know how hard it is to over sweeten something with honey? 

 

**Orange peel:** are you saying you’ve tried?

 

**Star boy:** n o

 

**Blueberry:** sometimes I eat honey by spoonfuls 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m sorry you what?

 

**Orange peel:** and you guys say I’m addicted to sugar 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you are

 

**Orange peel:** Gwah so rood 

 

**Star boy:** did you say “gwah” out loud?

 

**Orange peel:** no..

 

**Your worst nightmare:** how are you a bad liar over texts too?

 

**Blueberry:** I like how Hinata and yamaguchi are in the same room but are still texting 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** don’t act like you haven’t done that before 

 

**Blueberry:** no..

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me if you find major typos! Thanks.


	6. $50

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That’s gAy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter :)  
> I’ve been thinking about starting a new fic. That doesn’t mean this one will stop or come out less often I just want to let you know!

**Blueberry:** this outfit makes me feel super confident, but because I’m wearing a skirt I know my confidence will drop from 100 to 0 just from walking outside

 

 **Orange peel:** I’m sure you’ll look great in anything!

 

 **Blueberry:** Ajhslalahdkslalh

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** oh no, it was too gay for her to handle.

 

 **Orange peel:** I broke her ;-;

 

 **Blueberry:** sorry I felt emotions for a second there

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** what kind of emotions?

 

 **Blueberry:** Bold of you to assume I’d share that information with you

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** ;-;

 

 **Orange peel:** Where’s Tsukishima and Yamaguchi?

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** yeah Kei would have made some comment by now

 

 **Blueberry:** I don’t need his SASS right now anyway

 

 **Orange peel:** what if they’re on a date (΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)

 

 **Your worst nightmare:**  first of all I never want to see that emoticon again, also that’s wishful thinking.

 

 **Orange peel:** ok but like ya never know

 

 **Blueberry:** if they even liked each other it would still take 4000 years for one of them to say something

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** my bet is that Kei will make The first move if it ever happens.

 

 **Orange peel:** I like how we’re casually talking about their relationship as if they’re not in this chat

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** u rite

 

————————

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** y’all talking about me

 

 **Blueberry:** oh good your back

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** i smell sarcasm

 

 **Star boy:** sorry we were gone (・・;)

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** where were you?

 

 **Star boy:** oh

 

 **Star boy:** we were on a date

 

 **Orange peel:** WHAT DID I SAY

 

 **Blueberry:** wow you were right for once

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** Kei please tell me you made the first move I have 50 bucks on the line

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** oh well good news.

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** :^D

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** Yamaguchi made the first move

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** GOD

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** DAMMIT

 

 **Blueberry:** wow so proud

 

 **Star boy:** It took 5 minutes just to say “will you go out with me?” Because I was panicking

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** it was really cute tho

 

 **Orange peel:** awww

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** you didn’t hear that.

 

 **Orange peel:** ur right, i didn’t hear it. I read it and then I screenshotted it.

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** I will snap your phone in half

 

 **Blueberry:** Hinata when did you get snarky

 

 **Orange peel:** idk it’ll probably wear off in like 2 seconds tho

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I lost 50$ I’m gonna jump off a bridge.

 

 **Star boy:** aw please don’t

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** who did you make a bet with, tell em I just wanna talk.

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I’ll tell you just because I know you won’t do shit

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** I’ll jump them in an alleyway

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** oh so you’d jump suga in an alleyway

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:**....

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** you’re lying

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** AM I?

 

 **Blueberry:** :0 mom betrayed us

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	7. Betrayal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Betrayal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shortish chapter

**Depressed Bitch™:** I can NoT believe 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** that suga would do this to me

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ha

 

**Star boy:** aw it’s ok tsukki

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** IS IT 

 

**Blueberry:** well I don’t know about you but I’m having a good time. 

 

**Orange peel:** Kageyama, so mean 

 

**Blueberry:** shut up.

 

——————-

 

**Blueberry:** Oh

 

**Blueberry:** My

 

**Blueberry:** God

 

**Blueberry:** you guys are actually disgusting 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** whatever do you mean?

 

**Blueberry:** YOU KNOW 

 

**Star boy:** we’re just talking kageyama 

 

**Blueberry:** uh huh just talking. Care to tell me what you’re talking about?

 

**Star boy:** That…

 

**Star boy:** is none of your business, is it?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you’re just jealous you don’t have a boyfriend.

 

**Blueberry:** I AM NOT

 

**Orange peel:** not that anyone would like Kageyama anyway ♪(´ε｀ )

 

**Your worst nightmare:** …… Hinata….. ur killin me 

 

**Orange peel:** huh? 

 

——————-

 

**Depressed Bitch™ added “Mom” to the chat**

 

**Mom:** what’s happening?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I have something to discuss with you suga…. 

 

**Mom:** you sound so serious what’s wrong? ( ´ ▽ ` )

 

**Your worst nightmare:** wow you really did it huh.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** how dare you place bets on your own children.

 

**Blueberry:** go off 

 

**Mom:** oh 

 

**Mom:** so you know about that…. 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** DAMN RIGHT

 

**Mom:** language 

 

**Star boy:** tsukki it’s ok (*´-`)

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m feeling betrayal in the chili's tonight

 

**Mom:** I’ll split the money with you…

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ….

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** deal…

 

**Your worst nightmare:** HEY

 

**Blueberry:** that played out differently than I expected

 

**Orange peel:** I was really hoping for a fist fight

 

**Star boy:** no fighting!!!!!

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama wanna fite?

 

**Star boy:** No!!!!

 

**Blueberry:** HELL YEAH

 

**Star boy:** NOOO!!!!

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Encounter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry I didn’t post yesterday. We’ve been doing testing this week. :P

**Blueberry:** Are you

 

 **Blueberry:** fucking

 

 **Blueberry:** kidding me

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** oh gee another rant

 

 **Blueberry:** Bitch

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** that's my name

 

 **Mom:** and it’s a curse word, how dare you swear in my household

 

 **Blueberry:** I wore a skirt today….. outside…. in public.

 

 **Mom:** :0!!! Proud mom

 

 **Orange peel:** Yay!!!!!!!

 

 **Blueberry:** yeah yeah good great. EXCEPT I SAW A CERTAIN SETTER WHO IM NOT FOND OF!!

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** no

 

 **Blueberry:** Y e s

 

 **Star boy:** how did that go?

 

 **Blueberry:** he stared at me for a good 10 seconds and said nothing.

 

 **Star boy:** thatttsss not as bad as I thought.

 

 **Blueberry:** I GUESS

 **Orange peel:** he didn’t say anything mean??

 

 **Blueberry:** no

 

 **Orange peel:** no mean looks??

 

 **Blueberry:** no…

 

 **Orange peel:** then,,,, why are you upset?

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** she wanted an excuse to punch him

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** Ahshakhsakna

 

 **Blueberry:** oh shit he just messaged me

 

 **Star boy:** o_o

 

 **Blueberry:** he said “god I wish that were me.”

 

 **Mom:**...

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:**...

 

 **Orange peel:** …

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** …

 

 **Star boy:**...

 

 **Blueberry:** …

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** is that??? A compliment??

 

 **Orange peel:** yeah I think so

 

 **Blueberry:** a compliment,,, from Oikawa…

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** the world is ending probably

 

 **Blueberry:** yes that’s the only reasonable answer

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shortish chapter


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Watch as I slowly fall more and more off schedul~

**Orange peel:** not to be dramatic but I might die

 

**Your worst nightmare:** did something happen

 

**Orange peel:** I’ve realized something 

 

**Orange peel:** also I’m V e R y tired 

 

**Mom:** did you not get enough sleep? 

 

**Orange peel:** we all know that getting a good amount of sleep doesn’t stop you from being tired. 

 

**Blueberry:** oof truth hurts 

 

**Star boy:** you could drink coffee

 

**Blueberry:**  N O 

 

**Blueberry:** THAT IS FORBIDDEN 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** god remember that time he had coffee before practice 

 

**Blueberry:** G O D

 

**Orange peel:** it wasn’t that bad…

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yes it was

 

**Blueberry:** yes it was

 

**Your worst nightmare:** yes it was

 

**Mom:** yes it was 

 

**Star boy:** yes it was 

 

**Star boy:** I can’t believe I forgot

 

**Your worst nightmare:** welp you better suck it up because we have finals tomorrow 

 

**Blueberry:** F U C K

 

**Mom:** >:0

 

**Blueberry:** s o r r y

 

**Mom:** :)

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** any way have fun failing another test you two 

 

**Orange peel:** >:O

 

**Blueberry:** >:O

 

**Your worst nightmare:** no need to be so rude 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** >:)

 

**Star boy:** tsukki used an emoji

 

**Mom:** wowie

 

**Your worst nightmare:** Hinata, kageyama study after school or I’ll shatter your windows 

 

**Orange peel:**  o k?

 

**Blueberry:** but I wanna nap 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** and I wanna break things so it’s  your choice

 

**Blueberry:** oof fine 

 

**Mom:** i feel like my role as mom is being overruled 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No swearing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me? Uploading on time? It’s more likely than you think.

**Orange peel:** pretty people are going to be the death of me

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** care to elaborate

 

 **Orange peel:** n o

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** well speaking of pretty people….

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** please say what I think you’re gonna say

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I HAVE A DATE WITH KIYOKO

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** HELL YEAH!!!

 

 **Star boy:** I’ve never seen tsukki act like that what the fuck

 

 **Mom:** :0

 

 **Blueberry:** :0

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** :0

 

 **Orange peel:** :0

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** :0

 

 **Orange peel:** y-Yama said the f word

 

 **Star boy:** w o w

 

 **Mom:** I expected this out of kageyama but not you

 

 **Blueberry:** you say that like I did something

 

 **Star boy:** I’ll say it again

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** yams snapped o shit

 

 **Star boy:** f u c k

 

 **Orange peel:** this is the best day ever rn

 

 **Mom:** you’ve left me no choice…

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** o no

 

**Mom added “Dad” to the chat**

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** :O

 

 **Dad:** no

 

**Dad left the chat**

 

 **Blueberry:** damn

 

 **Mom:** wow betrayal.

 

**Mom left the chat**

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:**....

 

 **Star boy:** I feel like this is my fault

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I mean

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** yeah

 

 **Orange peel:** y’all no parents we’re free to do crimes

 

 **Blueberry:** Arson

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** I will add suga back if I even see you near a lighter

 

 **Blueberry:** :(

 

 **Orange peel:** :(

 

 **Star boy:** tsukki, remember that time we almost burned down your house??

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** I will literally break up with you if you finish that sentence

 


	11. 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> G a y

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Schools out so I’ll be back on schedule! Thanks for being patient! This chapter is really short but I wanted to get something out today, enjoy.

**Blueberry:** I’m mad and I don’t know why

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** me on a daily basis.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** can you guys stop being problematic?

 

**Blueberry:** no

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** no

 

**Orange peel:** I can give you a hug if it will make you feel better!!

 

**Star boy:** hmmm that’s a little gay..

 

**Blueberry:** no u

 

**Star boy:** wow kinda walked into that one 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I had faith in you

 

**Orange peel:** that’s a lie

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** kageyama tell your boyfriend to back off

 

**Blueberry:** he's not my boyfriend!

 

**Orange peel:** he’s not my boyfriend!!

 

**Your worst nightmare:** awe you guys are so in sync 

 

**Blueberry:** istg I will shatter your shins if you continue 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** but I like my shins they help me walk…

 

**Blueberry:** can they help you run? 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yachi don’t answer that

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ;-; I Leik me s hins 

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama be nice 

 

**Blueberry:** >:|

 

**Star boy:** g a y

  
  
  
  



	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They’re dead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: I’m going to post on time!!
> 
> Also me: *doesn't post for like 2 weeks*
> 
> I’ve decided to change up my schedule, I’m going to update at least twice a month instead of once a week.

**Your worst nightmare:** alright heckers 

 

**Blueberry:** woa language 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** stfu

 

**Your worst nightmare:** anyway y’all wanna go to the beach?

 

**Orange peel:** Y E S Y E S Y E S Y E S

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’ll pass 

 

**Star boy:** I wanna go!

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I guess I’ll come too

 

**Blueberry:** gay 

 

**Blueberry:** also sure 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** yaaayyy

 

**Blueberry:** wait how are we getting there 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I was thinking that we take a bus

 

**Orange peel:** watch us get kicked off or something 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** don’t jinx it 

 

**Star boy:** we should have a picnic!!

 

**Blueberry:** :0 f o o d?

 

**Star boy:** ye boi

 

**Your worst nightmare:** it’s beach time boys 

 

**——————**

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ITS PANIC TIME BOYS

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** oh?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** do you guys know where hinata and kageyama went after the picnic?? 

 

**Star boy:** wait we actually lost them??

 

**Star boy:** I knew they ran off but I thought they’d come right back 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** they’re dead

 

**Your worst nightmare:** DONT SAY THAT

 

**Star boy:** 100% dead 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** YAMA I TRUSTED YOU!!

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wonder where they could be :0


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning!: mentions of gender dysphoria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo waddup my sleep schedule is up fucked but it's cool or whatever.

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m going to lose my marbles 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** if we don’t find these mother fuckers 

 

**Star boy:** I can’t find them for the life of me 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I looked everywhere 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** bitch you’ve been laying on that towel for the past 30 minutes wdym

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ;-;

 

**Star boy:** I’m getting really worried

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** do u want a hug?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO BE CUTE IM PANICKING 

 

**Blueberry:** o shit waddup 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ITS BEEN 40 MINUTES WHERE THE FUCK

 

**Blueberry:** uh well 

 

**Blueberry:** I was experiencing a bit of dysphoria 

 

**Orange peel:** *a lot 

 

**Blueberry:** damn ok but yeah

 

**Blueberry:** so as one does I decided to hide somewhere and cry 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** are you ok????

 

**Blueberry:** yeah I’m doing ok-ish 

 

**Star boy:** wait so why was hinata gone?

 

**Blueberry:** I’m getting to that

 

**Blueberry:** so anyway while i was using tears to make a second ocean I saw that hinata followed me.

 

**Blueberry:** so the past 40 minutes have been on and off crying and talking. 

 

**Blueberry:** I’m doing pretty good after that but I’m probably still gonna sit under an umbrella and cover myself with a towel 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m glad you’re doing better

 

**Your worst nightmare:** you had me worried sick 

 

**Orange peel:** I’m really sorry yachi!!!! I didn’t mean to scare you

 

**Blueberry:** sorry. 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ack it’s ok I’m just glad you weren’t kidnapped 

 

**Star boy:** kageyama, do you want your shirt?

 

**Blueberry:** PLEASE 

 

**Star boy:** Omw 

 

**Star boy:** wait where are you

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m glad you guys are safe but where did you go?

 

**Orange peel:** we were under the walkway but we’re coming to you! 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** didn’t go too far.

 

**Blueberry:** if you look closely you can still see the puddle of tears.

 

**Orange peel:** hmm I feel like we forgot something. 

 

**Blueberry:** wha? 

 

**Orange peel:** !!!! The thing!!!

 

**Blueberry:** ???

 

**Blueberry:** oh wait. The thing.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** are you going to tell us or?

 

**Star boy:** OwO what’s this?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** omfg yams why

 

**Your worst nightmare:** what’s the thing?

 

**Blueberry:** u h.

 

**Orange peel:** uhh we’ll tell you later.

 

**Star boy:** ahsbsjjsks 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** y’all and your secrets istg

 

**Your worst nightmare:** y’all

 

**Blueberry:** y’all 

 

**Orange peel:** y’all 

 

**Star boy:** y’all 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m going to murder all of you

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I feel like this chapter could have been better but idk. Anyway hope you liked it.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wuv u

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter

**Blueberry:** W H E E Z E 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** C O U G H

 

**Star boy:** H A C K

 

**Orange peel:** A C H O O

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** hey what the fuck?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m leaving you guys are too extra

 

**Star boy:** oof we scared away tsukki

 

**Orange peel:** I surprised it hasn’t happened before.

 

**Orange peel:** I’m gonna go bother him

 

**Blueberry:** proof that hinata annoys people on purpose 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** u love him tho

 

**Blueberry:** I don’t recall ever saying that

 

**Orange peel:** I do

 

**Star boy:** :0 oop-

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** wow kageyama can feel love

 

**Blueberry:** I thought you left

 

**Your worst nightmare:** wow I can’t believe it’s cannon 

 

**Star boy:** I can’t believe it’s not butter 

 

**Star boy:** tsukki I heard that sigh how dare you

 

**Blueberry:** so you’re in the same room huh ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** …..

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** so you told Hinata you love him huh?

 

**Blueberry:** DON'T TURN THIS ON ME

 

**Your worst nightmare:** yeah when did you?

 

**Blueberry:** afagsgjshdksjdskslld

 

**Orange peel:** yeah kageyama when

 

**Blueberry:** hinata I stg 

 

**Orange peel:** anyway, we’ve been dating since our beach day

 

**Blueberry:** wow no hesitation 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I KNEW IT 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** Yama, your money hand it over.

 

**Blueberry:** what is with you guys and betting?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I don’t have a job I’ll take what I can get

 

**Star boy:** I’m being robbed tsukki help me

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** die

 

**Star boy:** w o w

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can’t feel me legs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just re-read the first chapter??? What a train wreck?? Like it got better but the first half was all over the place Christ.
> 
> Update: I added spacers to chapter 1 to break it up a bit, it seems less erratic that way

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m…… so gay

 

**Your worst nightmare:** i went shopping with kiyoko and she tried on this dress,,,,, she’s so p r e t t y

 

**Your worst nightmare:** l i k e, marry me please.

 

**Star boy:** can I be the best man?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you’re the flower boy.

 

**Star boy:** o o f

 

**Orange peel:** is this what it feels like to have a cat??

 

**Star boy:** huh?

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama and I were watching a movie together and he fell asleep with his head in my lap

 

**Orange peel:** I don’t wanna wake him up,,,, I can’t move

 

**Your worst nightmare:** that’s so cute

 

**Orange peel:** I can’t feel my legs 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** perish

 

**Orange peel:** I’ll shatter your bones how dare you

 

**Your worst nightmare:** o no he a n g r y

 

**Star boy:** I’m getting “ÒwÓ” vibes 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m sorry w h a t?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** are you saying you don’t get ÒwÓ vibes??

 

**Your worst nightmare:** w h a t

 

**Orange peel:** ya know like “ÒwÓ”

 

**Blueberry:** yeah like,,,, “ÒwÓ”

 

**Your worst nightmare:** fuck you

 

**Your worst nightmare:** wait kags I thought you were asleep 

 

**Blueberry:** I woke up like 5 minutes ago I’ve just been letting hinata suffer 

 

**Orange peel:** WOW 

 

**Orange peel:** I'M BREAKING UP WITH U, RELATIONSHIP CANCELED 

 

**Blueberry:** o no this is so sad

 

**Your worst nightmare:** skskskskksksks

 

**Star boy:** my otp is canceled I’m crying 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I…. I thought W E were otp ;-;

 

**Star boy:** tsukki I stg

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I-is that allowed? Is this allowed??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Stranger things is pretty good bruh

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** there is no God 

 

**Blueberry:** there is and it’s me 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** fuc u

 

**Orange peel:** fuc 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** fuc

 

**Blueberry:** fuc

 

**Star boy:** fuc

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Yama I trusted you

 

**Star boy:** sorry, i'm evil now

 

**Your worst nightmare:** this sounds like a bad romance plot

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** our whole relationship is a bad romance plot

 

**Star boy:** normally I would disagree, but honestly we should have gotten together at least 2 years ago

 

**Star boy:** but ya know, internationalized homophobia and all that fun stuff

 

**Blueberry:** sounds fun 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** it was g r e a t

 

**Orange peel:** sorry to interrupt but, KAGEYAMA COME HERE!!!! 

 

**Blueberry:** huh?

 

**Orange peel:** I FOUND A CAT!!!

 

**Blueberry:** WHERE!!

 

**Your worst nightmare:** tbh the fact they got together doesn’t surprise me

 

**Your worst nightmare:** they’re like,,,, soulmates or something.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** don’t tell them I said this but 100% yeah

 

**Star boy:** aw tsukkiiii

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** s h u t

 

**——————**

 

**Blueberry:** hi I’m keeping the cat and it’s mine now 

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama no

 

**Blueberry:** nope too late it’s mine I own it now her name is tangerine and I love her

 

**Orange peel:** why tangerine it’s an all black cat.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** she’s naming it after you dumbass 

 

**Orange peel:** ..... oh

 

**Orange peel:** AWWWWwwwwWWW KAGEYAMA

 

**Blueberry:** >:|

 

**Orange peel:** but like, are you even allowed to keep it??

 

**Blueberry:** if no one knows then yes

 

**Star boy:** this sounds like a bad idea

 

**Blueberry:** but it’s just a babbbyy

 

**Orange peel:** that cat is at least 2 years old 

 

**Blueberry:** it’s a baaabbbbyyyy

  
  



	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skskskskksks and I oop ksksksks

**Your worst nightmare:** we should cosplay the sailor scouts and Tangerine can be Luna 

 

**Star boy:** omgomgomgomgomgomg

 

**Star boy:** y e s

 

**Blueberry:** my mom still doesn’t know about Tangerine lol

 

**Your worst nightmare:** this is a disaster waiting to happen.

 

**Blueberry:** that’s pretty normal when it comes to me

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** disaster since day one

 

**Blueberry:** put that on a shirt p l e a s e

 

**Orange peel:** I’m coming over to visit my daughter 

 

**Blueberry:** adgshdhdksks ok  

 

**Your worst nightmare:** wow a happy family 

 

**Star boy:** tsukki we need to up our game 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yo what?

 

**Star boy:** we can’t let them out cute us 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** the ultimate showdown

 

**Your worst nightmare:** k bye I’m going to go cuddle and watch a movie with kiyoko 

 

**Star boy:** yachi is beating us and she’s not even playing this is so sad

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** better fucking watch out I’m going to bake the best god damn cookies 

 

**Star boy:** oh really?? Get ready for the cuddle of your life fucker 

 

**Orange peel:** and I oop-

 

**Blueberry:** use one more meme and I’m filing a divorce 

 

**Orange peel:** oop

 

**Blueberry:** that’s it I get full custody say goodbye to Tangerine 

 

**Orange peel:** ;-;


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deadass thought I posted this last week but I guess not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I added time stamps look at me being all fancy

**_8:21pm_ **

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Yama went to get snacks and now I’m cold

 

**Your worst nightmare:** were you cuddling??

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** y e s ;-;

 

**Star boy:** tsukki gimmie like 5 minutes 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** that’s 5 minutes too many 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** aw Kei is clingy 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** shut ur fuck 

 

**Star boy:** awwww

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I will end you

 

**Star boy:** but then who will cuddle you?

 

**Blueberry:** y’all need to stop being nasty in this here group chat 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** nooo they were having a moment

 

**Blueberry:** I got diabetes just from holding my phone 

 

**_________________**

**_10:37pm_ **

 

**Star boy:** TsUKkI feLL aSlEeP on meEE

 

**Star boy:** my dudes he’s so cute 

 

**Star boy:** little angel 

 

**Orange peel:** more like a demon 

 

**Orange peel:** tall ass, McDonalds fri lookin

 

**Your worst nightmare:** AHSHAJJSJS GO OFF

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I w h e e z e d

 

**Your worst nightmare:** fuck I showed it to Kiyoko and she laughed and now I’m having a gay panic 

 

**Star boy:** you poor little disaster lesbian 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** b i t c h I’ll bust ur knee caps

 

**Star boy:** t r y m e

 

**Orange peel:** well that escalated 

 

**___________**

 

**11:43 am**

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama wore a dress on our date and I am deceased 

 

**Orange peel:** please bury me with pictures of tobio and a volleyball so I can still play as a ghost 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** finally he’s dead

 

**Blueberry:** I’ll kick you in the stomach with my heels

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m jealous, every time I wear heels I trip and die

 

**Blueberry:** I’m  _ very _ graceful if you must know

 

**Orange peel:** s u r e

 

**Blueberry:** >:0


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pancakes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Congrats ao3!

**_9:21 am_ **

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m so bored you don’t understand 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** big same

 

**Star boy:** we should do something

 

**Your worst nightmare:** duh

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** id prefer this one to be incident free

 

**Star boy:** I really want pancakes so maybe we could go out for breakfast 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** that sounds a m a z i n g

 

**Star boy:** ^-^ what about you tsukki

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** sure

 

**Star boy:** yayyyy

 

____________

 

**_12:24 pm_ **

 

**Blueberry:** you got pancakes…

 

**Blueberry:** w i t h o u t m e?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yea.

 

**Orange peel:** aw I wanted pancakes T^T

 

**Star boy:** ( T_T)＼(^-^ )

 

**Your worst nightmare:** c u t e

 

**Blueberry:** I can make you pancakes…

 

**Orange peel:** I literally have no faith that you can cook

 

**Blueberry:** damn ok no pancakes for you then 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** do you know how to cook?

 

**Blueberry:** yes?

 

**Star boy:** that’s not reassuring 

 

**Orange peel:** I’ll eat them if they look edible 

 

**Blueberry:** you can’t be picky 

 

**Orange peel:** LOOKING EDIBLE IS BEING PICKY???

 

**Blueberry:** y e s

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Time to wait for kageyama to tell us he burned down the house 

 

**Star boy:** don’t jinx it 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** 911 on speed dial 

 

____________

 

**_12:48 pm_ **

 

**Blueberry:** so there wasn’t a house fire…

 

**Your worst nightmare:** nice

 

**Blueberry:** but a smoke alarm went off

 

**Your worst nightmare:** -_-

 

**Blueberry:** but it was because of Hinata, the pancakes were fine 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** wait what???

 

**Blueberry:** k bye 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** P L E A S E ELABORATE 

  
  
  
  



	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, schools a bitch rn. Sorry I don’t answer comments I want to start doing that

**_8:47 pm_ **

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ÓwÒ 

 

**Star boy:** ÚwÙ 

 

**Orange peel:** ÒwÓ 

 

**Blueberry:** OwO

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** did I mention I hate you all??

 

**Orange peel:** probably 

 

**Star boy:** don’t be mean 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** sorry it’s my job to be mean

 

**Your worst nightmare:** where can I sign up?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** sorry you’re not qualified, you’re too nice.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** darn

 

**Blueberry:** ÙwÚ im mean

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you’re like, annoyingly mean instead of hurtful mean

 

**Blueberry:** I’m rotten to the core, bad to the bone...

 

**Orange peel:** we literally cuddled last night stfu

 

**Star boy:** oop called out 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ÚwÙ kageyama’s soft

 

**Blueberry:** >:/

 

**—————**

**_11:23pm_ **

 

**Star boy:** tssuuuukkkkiiii

 

**Star boy:** play animal crossing with me! I redid my house! 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ok :)

 

**Your worst nightmare:** a smiley face?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** typed by MY tsukishima??

 

**Your worst nightmare:** it’s more likely than you think 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** shut ur fuck 

 

**Your worst nightmare: (ﾟωﾟ)**

 

**Orange peel:** #softboy

 

**Your worst nightmare:** hey Hinata?

 

**Orange peel:** yea?

 

**Your worst nightmare:** do me a favor and never use a hashtag in this chat ever again 

 

**Orange peel: (ㆀ˘･з･˘)** ok 

 

**Orange peel:** #sadboyhours

 

**Your worst nightmare:** HINATA I STG 

 

**Orange peel:** :)

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 21st chapter on the 21st

**_8:00am_ **

 

**Blueberry:** starting to think I should just get the girls uniform but I also don’t wanna out myself to the whole school rn so like 

 

**Orange peel:** is that why you’re not here today?

 

**Blueberry:** y e p

 

**Blueberry:** also my mom found out about Tangerine

 

**Your worst nightmare:** oop

 

**Blueberry:** she loves her a lot and now Tangerine only hangs out with her ;-;

 

**Star boy:** aw 

 

**Blueberry:** my daughter betrayed me ;-; we were supposed to have some mother daughter bonding today but noOoooo

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** Hina come get ur wife she’s having a crisis

 

**Orange peel:** *ahem* my darling angel whatever is the matter?

 

**Blueberry:** whshsjksks s t o p

**—————-**

 

**_5:35pm_ **

 

**Your worst nightmare:** hey Hinata welcome to the “I love my wife” club

 

**Your worst nightmare:** it’s a club where we just sit and gush about our wives 

 

**Orange peel:** sounds amazing, to start off I love my wife’s hair it’s really silky 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** dude same kiyoko’s hair is so soft

 

**Orange peel:** h e r s m i l e…

 

**Your worst nightmare:** T HE SMIL E S 

 

**Blueberry:** omg hinta im begging you to stop I’m in the same room as my mom and she’s so confused rn 

 

**Blueberry:** I’m tomato red I’m gonna die 

 

**Orange peel:** wife has been successfully flustered. mission accomplished 

 

**Star boy:** this is the wholesome content I signed up for. 

 

**Star boy:** I know it’s called “I love my wife club” but can I talk about tsukki for a bit

 

**Orange peel:** yes!!!

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** no

 

**Your worst nightmare:** go ahead 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** NO

 

**Star boy:** omg he’s so cute, guys you don’t understand 

 

**Star boy:** believe it or not he’s really sweet. tsukki doesn’t smile very often but when he does it’s like staring at the sun…

 

**Star boy:** and I get nervous easily and he’s good at bringing me back down to earth. It’s nice to know that I’ll always have someone to keep my from floating away

 

**Star boy:** he makes me so happy. Every time I see him I get butterflies in my stomach, and when he holds me I feel so safe.

 

**Star boy:** long story short I love my husband 

 

**Orange peel:** AWWWWWWWWW

 

**Your worst nightmare:** that was so cute wtf

 

**Your worst nightmare:** tsukki u good? R you alive??

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yeah I’m alive I think 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** it’s just that I’ve never been in a relationship before. And Tadashi means so much to me. 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’m just glad I’m making him happy.

 

**Star boy:** is it ok if I come over?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** please 

 

**—————**

 

**10:37am**

 

**Star boy:** goooddddd mmmoorrnning 

 

**Orange peel:** morning!

 

**Orange peel:** what did you and kei do last night????? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Star boy:** I don’t think I like the implications of that face 

 

**Orange peel:** ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

**Star boy:** annnd I’m going back to bed.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** Hinataaa you scared him away

 

**Orange peel:** w h o o p s

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mall trip ÚwÙ

**_11:40am_ **

 

**Your worst nightmare:** dearest gays it’s been so long since we’ve hung out

 

**Your worst nightmare:** so I’m here to formally invite you to the mall

 

**Orange peel:** it would be an honor 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you guys are dorks but sure 

 

**Blueberry:** Sounds good, hinata stole my jacket so I need a new one 

 

**Orange peel:** you don’t have to call me out like that 

 

**Blueberry:** it had to be done

 

**Orange peel:** ;-; betrayal 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** by the way I’m inviting kiyoko too

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** hm sounds gay

 

**Your worst nightmare:** damn right it is 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** now let’s go wreak havoc at the mall

  
  


**——————**

**_1:26pm_ **

 

**Star boy:** tsukki and I kinda split from the group sorry about that.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** nah you’re good 

 

**Orange peel:** you guys were so lovey-dovey it was killing me. Get a room

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** why do you think we left 

 

**Orange peel:** UGH

 

**—————**

**_2:04pm_ **

  
  


**Blueberry:** I sense dread

 

**Your worst nightmare:** uh that was ominous 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I like how you can sense him

 

**Blueberry:** him???

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** guess who’s at the mall today

 

**Blueberry:** no

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yes

 

**Blueberry:** NOOO

 

**Orange peel:** who?

 

**Star boy:** tsukki and I ran into Oikawa just now

 

**Blueberry:** welp this was fun time to leave

 

**Orange peel:** he’s not even thhhattt bbbaaaddd

 

**Blueberry:** he’s a bastard and will 100% try to embarrass me in front of you

 

**Orange peel:** Tobio, there’s literally no way you could embarrass yourself more than you have in the past 

 

**Blueberry:** damn ok ouch

 

**Orange peel:** but awe you don’t wanna get embarrassed in front of me awww

 

**Blueberry:** shut 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** asdhhddhnlhdskljhl

 

**Blueberry:** HE FUCKING SAW ME I HATE BEING TALL

 

**Star boy:** no you don’t

 

**Blueberry:** you’re right I don’t…. BUT STILL 

 

**Blueberry:** heck he’s right behind us 

 

**Orange peel:** I think he’s here with Iwaizumi so we might be safe 

 

**Blueberry:** thank goddd

 

**Orange peel:** does he know we’re dating?

 

**Blueberry:** no?

 

**Orange peel:** let’s mess with him, hold my heckin hand 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** woah language 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** but also I love where this is going, I’ll be with my wife have fun you two

 

**—————**

**_3:54pm_ **

 

**Orange peel:** kageyama said a total of 7 words and died

 

**Star boy:** what happened 

 

**Orange peel:** so we were walking around holding hands, and oikawa was super confused

 

**Orange peel:** so he was like “I can’t let them out gay me” and grabbed poor iwaizumis hand and moved to walk next to us and said “Oh kageyama! I didn’t expect to see you here.”

 

**Orange peel:** ya know in that weird fake cheerful kinda intimidating voice he does 

 

**Orange peel:** anyway, tobio gives him this bright ass smile and said “I’m on a date with my boyfriend!” And drags me into the nearest store where he’s now sitting in the corner and staring at the ceiling. 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** agshhsjs

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I can’t believe kageyamas dead… this is so sad.. ;-;

 

**Orange peel:** the workers are getting concerned

 

**Orange peel:** Gah Tobio move gosh darn it 

 

**Blueberry:** im tired

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** from what, existing?

 

**Blueberry:** y e s

 

**Blueberry:** I got so prepared for the worst only for nothing to happen and now I wanna take a nap 

 

**Blueberry:** I fucking smiled today, like w h a t?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I didn’t know you were capable of smiling 

 

**Blueberry:** I’m too tired to tell you to shut up, someone do it for me 

 

**Star boy:** shut up tsukki 

 

**Blueberry:** ….. it’s weird when you say it

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** sorry tadashi 

 

**Blueberry:** that’s worse 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like these chapters aren't as good as they use to be... Lowkey miss suga he’s been gone for so long ;-; but ya know Saturday’s are for the first years


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, it’s been a busy week :P

**_12:36pm_ **

 

**Orange peel:** Wahhh Tangerine bit me ;-;

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** perish 

 

**Blueberry:** ^

 

**Your worst nightmare:** ^

 

**Star boy:** ^

 

**Orange peel:** Tobio!!! R u d e

 

**Blueberry:** :)

 

**Orange peel:** Kenma would never treat me like this smh

 

**Your worst nightmare:** :0!!! Oh shit

 

**Blueberry:** :0 

 

**Blueberry:** are you trying to make me jealous???

 

**Orange peel:** ... is it working?

 

**Blueberry:** y e s 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** kageyama is a big softy confirmed 

 

**Blueberry changed “Your worst nightmare’s” name to “You’re worst nightmare”**

 

**You’re worst nightmare:** I’m sorry please fix it 

**Blueberry:** >:) 

 

**You’re worst nightmare:** ;-; spare me

**Depressed Bitch™:** kageyamas evil now 

 

**Star boy:** you should join forces, together you’d be the antichrist 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** …..

 

**Blueberry:** ……

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** it’s been taken into consideration 

 

**Blueberry:** it’s been taken into consideration 

 

**Star boy:** ew never talk at the same time again 

 

**Orange peel:** honestly the day they team up is the day the world ends 

 

**Orange peel:** they walk into practice but their arms are locked and they’re acting like the twins from The Shining 

 

**You’re worst nightmare:**  absolutely terrifying 

 

**You’re worst nightmare:** I forgot about the hell that is my name for a second 

 

**Orange peel changed “You’re worst nightmare”’s name to “Your worst nightmare”**

 

**Your worst nightmare:** thank you, you and Yamaguchi are the only bitches I trust 

  
  



	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> THATS MY WIFE

**_4:54pm_ **

**Orange peel:** I'm starting to realize that we've corrupted Yachi

 

**Your worst nightmare:** huh?

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** yeah you went from ”i’ll shatter like glass” to ”i’ll shatter YOU like glass”

**Your worst nightmare:** I’m very scary

 

**Blueberry:** a force to be reckoned with

**Star boy:** while on the topic of Yachi how are you and kiyoko 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** were getting married next week 

 

**Orange peel:** affagshsjsjs that was fast

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I wish it were true ;-;

 

**Your worst nightmare:** but in all seriousness, we go on dates every week and she won’t stop flirting with me during practice so I’d say it’s going good.

 

**Star boy:** hey tsukki how come we don’t go on dates every week???

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** you come to my house like every other day????

 

**Star boy:** fair point

 

**Star boy:** but still 

 

**Orange peel:** ever since Tobio got Tangerine they never pay attention to me when I come over smh

 

**Blueberry:** you’re jealous of a cat???

 

**Orange peel:** you’re jealous of Kenma??

 

**Blueberry:** KENMA’S NOT A CAT??

 

**Orange peel:** HE'S CLOSE ENOUGH

 

**Blueberry:** WDYM HE’S “CLOSE ENOUGH”???

 

**Your worst nightmare:** you guys are so married 

 

**Blueberry:** aggshehsjsksksk

 

**Star boy:** Kageyama's dead

 

**Orange peel:** this happens like every time they get flustered 

 

**Orange peel:** it’s almost like they’ve never experienced that emotion before so Tobio just shuts down every time it happens.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** idk why you put “almost” that’s exactly what happens 

 

**Star boy:** Tsukki is so cute when he’s flustered ^-^

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** d o n t

 

**Star boy:** his face gets all red and he tries to hide his smile by covering his face with his hands 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** S T O PPPpppp

 

**Star boy:** sorry Tsukki (￣▽￣;)

 

**Your worst nightmare:** oh no please continue

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I’d like to hear more

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** You’re lucky kiyoko isn’t in this chat you fiend.

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ... wait a second

 

**Your worst nightmare:** don’t do what I think you’re gonna do….

 

**Depressed Bitch™ added Kiyoko Shimizu to the chat.**

 

**Your worst nightmare:** NOOOOOO

 

**Kiyoko Shimizu:** what’s this?

 

**Depressed Bitch™ changed “Kiyoko Shimizu”’s name to “Yachi’s wife”**

 

**Yachi’s wife:** accurate 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** embarrass Yachi for me please 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** spare me p l e as e

 

**Yachi’s wife:** hmm no

 

**Orange peel:** o u c h

 

**Yachi’s wife:** Hitoka can’t handle compliments at all

 

**Yachi’s wife:** one time i said “I like your hair.” And she got all red and kept stuttering while trying to say “thank you” 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** my reputation…. 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** nonexistent but go off 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** kiyoko…. kei’s bullying me tell him to stop 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** no bullying 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** ;-; fine 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** >:) 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** one time Hitoka spilled her drink on me and started crying 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** THAT WAS LIKE OUR SECOND DATE I PANICKED 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** it was still funny, especially after you stopped freaking out and realized I was wearing a white shirt 

 

**Your worst nightmare:** I COULD SEE YOUR BRA WHAT’D YOU WANT ME TO DO?? NOT HAVE GAY THOUGHTS????

 

**Blueberry:** Yachi you poor useless lesbian

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** oh you’re alive 

 

**Star boy:** kageyama you can’t handle compliments either, you don’t have the right to call Yachi a “useless lesbian” you useless gay.

 

**Blueberry:** I feel attacked. 

 

**Orange peel:** good 

 

**Blueberry:** damn 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** do you guys know how to express affection without making fun of each other?

 

**Blueberry:** no

 

**Orange peel:** no

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** no 

 

**Star boy:** Tsukki that’s not true, yesterday you kept wanting to cuddle and you’d tell me you loved me like every 5 minutes. 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** AFGSHSJAJJSJS DONT TELL THEM THAT

 

**Star boy:** sorry Tsukki

 

**Yachi’s wife:** I’m sure the rest of the team would love to hear that your relationship is going well

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** kiyoko please spare my life 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** no

 

**Your worst nightmare:** have I ever told you I love you??

 

**Yachi’s wife:** yes, and I love you too :)

 

**Yachi’s wife:** that’s why kei will suffer the consequences of bullying you.

 

**Your worst nightmare:** :D

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** well this backfired 

 

**Yachi’s wife:** y e p

 

**Yachi’s wife left the chat**

 

**Blueberry:** “ I love you yamaguchi” “come here let’s cuddle” 

 

**Depressed Bitch™:** I’LL ERASE YOU FROM THIS WORLD 

  
  



	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UwU

**_3:03_ **

 

 **Blueberry:** watching tsukishima suffer is pretty fun

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** I don’t appreciate your bullying 

 

 **Blueberry:** I would never UwU 

 

 **Orange peel:** you bully me everyday but ok

 

 **Blueberry:** you’re not an angel either 

 

 **Orange peel:** you called me angel yesterday :(

 

 **Blueberry:** AS A PET NAME 

 

 **Star boy:** UwU that’s cute

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I think the amount of “UwU”’s is getting too much 

 

 **Star boy:** UwU 

 

 **Orange peel:** UwU

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** UwU 

 

 **Blueberry:** UwU 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** ew

 

 **Orange peel:** no u

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** >:0

 

 **Blueberry:** I love my Boyf UwU 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** FOR BULLYING ME? ;-;

 

 **Blueberry:** THERE'S OTHER REASONS 

 

 **Blueberry:** that just happens to be one of them

 

 **Orange peel:** UwU 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** the “UwU”’s are reaching the double digits range and that’s not good

 

 **Orange peel:** they weren’t in the double digits till you said it

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** that doesn’t count 

 

 **Star boy:** nah I think the counts 

 

 **Star boy:** that’s for contributing to our cause yachi

 

 **Orange peel:** yes thank you your donation is appreciated

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** w ait no

 

 **Star boy:** UwU 

 

 **Star boy:** UwU 

 

 **Star boy:** UwU 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** kei this is your fault 

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** aghsjs how?

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** you probably taught him this 

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** just because I encouraged him to do it doesn’t mean I did it

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** BABAHSWHAT?

 

 **Blueberry:** yachi you’re not making sense 

 

 **Depressed Bitch™:** yeah maybe check your auto correct?

 

 **Orange peel:** for someone with good grades you have pretty bad grammar 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I hate this family 

 

 **Star boy:** UwU you love us

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** I’d love you more if you’d get rid of that emoticon 

 

 **Star boy:** OwO is this better 

 

 **Your worst nightmare:** UGH

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos appreciated :)


End file.
